When you are dealing with an alcoholic child, you have to be firm and not think that things will change. You cannot think that this is just a phase that they are going through. Many parents prefer to think that their child young or old is just having a rough time and just needs to unwind. This is what can lead to alcohol abuse and future problems. Someone that drinks because they need to unwind or because the parent thinks it is just a phase can become an alcoholic if this type of behavior continues. Parents never want to believe that their child has a drinking problem.
If your child is an alcoholic, you need to understand that sticking up for them when they do something wrong is not going to help them. If they are a younger child or an adult child with a family, you as a parent cannot allow them to continue doing the things that they do. You have to be responsible enough to see that there is a problem and take steps to help. Making excuses or believing that your child could never do something bad is wrong. You do not know for certain what they are capable of doing when they are drinking.
No matter if is an adult child or a young child, you need to be firm and not coddle them. A parent that sees nothing and does not want to know anything is just asking for trouble. Coddling a child that is an alcoholic can show them that what they are doing is acceptable. This could lead to something horrible happening. If you believe that your child could never be abusive or that they have a drinking problem, you are just enabling them to continue. Waking up one day to find out that your child has hurt someone or his or her self can be devastating.
It was probably coddling that got them into the mess they are in now. If you wear blinders where your children are concerned, it is more than likely going to be your fault if something happens. If you know that there is a drinking problem, you must be strong. Allowing your child to drink in excess can lead to repercussions. As a parent of an alcoholic child, young or old, you must deal with the problem instead of coddling them and making excuses for them.
If a spouse or partner tells you that your son or daughter has a drinking problem, never blame the spouse or partner. They are not the ones who are drinking. Alcoholics do not need a reason to drink. They drink because they have a disease and an addiction that they need help overcoming. By turning a blind eye to the problem, you are making matters worst. If a spouse tells you that your child has a drinking problem and is abusive at times, tell that person that it is their fault is not going to help your child.
Parents do not want to hear that their child is an alcoholic. No parent wants to hear this, but the facts are that any child from any background can have a drinking problem. If you as a parent do not address the problem, you are enabling your child to continue drinking and endangering anyone around them including yourself. You must help and be supportive of the spouse and your child, but you cannot deny there is a problem. You as a parent have to take steps to get your child help.